Everyone wants to be physically healthy. You want to be mentally healthy, as well. The true measure of “mental fitness” is how optimistic you are about yourself and your life.
You can learn how to control your thinking in very specific ways so that you feel terrific about yourself and your situation, no matter what happens.
Control Your Reactions and Responses
There are three basic differences in the reactions of optimists and pessimists. The first difference is that the optimist sees a setback as temporary, while the pessimist sees it as permanent. The optimist sees an unfortunate event, such as an order that falls through or a sales call that fails, as a temporary event, something that is limited in time and has no real impact on the future. The pessimist, on the other hand, sees negative events as permanent, as part of life and destiny.
Isolate the Incident
The second difference between the optimist and the pessimist is that the optimist sees difficulties as specific, while the pessimist sees them as pervasive. This means that when things go wrong for the optimist, he looks at the event as an isolated incident largely disconnected from other things that are going on in his life.
For example, if something you were counting on failed to materialize and you interpreted it as being an unfortunate event, but something that happens in the course of life and business, you would be reacting like an optimist. The pessimist, on the other hand, sees disappointments as being pervasive. That is, to him they are indications of a problem or shortcoming that pervades every area of life.
Don’t Take Failure Personally
The third difference between optimists and pessimists is that optimists see events as external, while pessimists interpret events as personal. When things go wrong, the optimist will tend to see the setback as resulting from external factors over which one has little control.
If the optimist is cut off in traffic, for example, instead of getting angry or upset, he will simply downgrade the importance of the event by saying something like, “Oh, well, I guess that person is just having a bad day.”
The pessimist, on the other hand, has a tendency to take everything personally. If the pessimist is cut off in traffic, he will react as though the other driver has deliberately acted to upset and frustrate him.
Remain Calm and Objective
The hallmark of the fully mature, fully functioning, self-actualizing personality is the ability to be objective and unemotional when caught up in the inevitable storms of daily life. The superior person has the ability to continue talking to himself in a positive and optimistic way, keeping his mind calm, clear and completely under control. The mature personality is more relaxed, aware and capable of interpreting events more realistically and less emotionally than the immature personality. As a result, the mature person exerts a far greater sense of control and influence over his environment and is far less likely to be angry, upset, or distracted.
Take the Long View
Look upon the inevitable setbacks you face as being temporary, specific and external. View the negative situation as a single event that is not connected to other potential events and that is caused largely by external factors over which you have little control. Simply refuse to see the event as being in any way permanent, pervasive or indicative of personal incompetence or inability.
Resolve to think like an optimist, no matter what happens. You may not be able to control events, but you can control the way you react to them.
Action Exercises
Here are three things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, remind yourself continually that setbacks are only temporary; they will soon be past, and nothing is as serious as you think it is.
Second, look upon each problem as a specific event, not connected to other events and not indicative of a pattern of any kind. Deal with it and get on with your life.
Third, recognize that when things go wrong, they are usually caused by a variety of external events. Say to yourself, “What can’t be cured must be endured,” and then get back to thinking about your goals.
This entry was posted on Thursday, June 5th, 2008 at 2:36 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.6 Responses to “Be an Optimist at All Times”
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June 9th, 2008 at 7:02 am
i would like to say thank you to the person who wrote this article. This is becasue it is so true.
You as a person control your own destiny and no one else so take control of your life and be positive.
Your life is shaped by your thoughts.
June 17th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Interesting read. Almost all points mentioned are very true. Thanks for sharing it with us.
June 18th, 2008 at 9:12 am
This is such a great post because it shows that optimists aren’t in a state of denial. Instead they have a handle on issues because they see them for what they are.
June 18th, 2008 at 10:18 pm
Very insightful. Very helpful. Absolutely doable.
June 20th, 2008 at 4:32 am
I really like your wonderful ideas. If someone thinks like you, the personal conflict would not happen.
June 23rd, 2008 at 9:58 pm
I love this article. It really caught my eye because I read about a new software, Glyphius. I am usually very positive, but after spending so much money on wasted producst I am just not sure about it. It sounds really good. But okay, I have to be optomistic! I always make everything go right. So what the hey! Thanks for the uplifting article!